The Longest Ride, movie review

Within minutes of this movie starting—I wanted to get up and leave. But the theater was crowded and I didn’t want to go through the bother of disturbing everyone to leave. So I stayed… and entertained myself by cracking jokes in my head the whole time.

An example of the frustration I dealt with. “What nail polish color is that?” “Clear.” “Oh haha” Later we can see the nail polish and it’s not clear, so I was like, WTF was with that comment?

It’s obvious the dialogue and a large portion of the scenes are cut from someone’s direct experience. I can see someone in the storyboard room going, “My boyfriend asked me what color my nail polish was once, and it was clear, it was so funny, we should put it in the movie.”

The acting was horrible. Like, I thought I was watching a porno or something. A porno that never delivered. Don’t go thinking you’ll be getting all hot and heavy, soooo not that kind of movie.

When I saw the storyline with the cowboy and frat girl was falling flat, I held hope that the story with the elderly couple would be good. Yeah, it wasn’t. I mean, it had more of a story line to it, but it was still poorly acted and the whole, “old man telling the story to the frat girl” was really forced and unbelievable.

All I can say is, avoid this movie at all costs. Don’t redbox it, don’t watch it if it comes on the cablebox for free. Just avoid it and run the other way. If you’re like, “but the actor is hot.” It’s not worth it my friend.

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About mizner13

Welcome to my blog! I live in Florida with my husband and our Kitty, a rescued Abyssinian. I have several novels published under the name "Nina Schluntz". I’m an avid movie goer, so most of my blog posts will be a review of the most recent movie I happened to see. Sometimes I’ll mix it up and read a book too. Or… my favorite, I’ll see the movie then read the book it was based on! View all posts by mizner13

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